it amazes me the amount of you people that have no idea how to prepare food for consumption. in short, you are pathetic. if there was a calamity tomorrow, you would be at the mercy of many, many really fucking stupid people in the world, because most stupid people in the world at least know how to cook. mostly because they dont have enough money to buy the food, or pay someone to make it for them.
those people in the world deemed attractive by their respective cultures tend to be more stupid on the average cuz they get by on their looks. you have never been accused of this. i know because you are reading my blog.
when some moistened bint marries that freakish rich dude, it skews things up. all of a sudden, current physical-attractive qualities in one spouse mesh with usually ugly-attractrive qualities and you have mutant children who usually end up really fucked up because of a hot/stupid parent and a smart/ugly/rich parent.
in any event, preparing food is wicked easy. to smoke ribs:
fuck your easy gas grill. thats right, open it up and stick your cock(there are no women reading this, and if there are, they probably have a cock) between the kooky grate structure and pump away. for good food, that is all your easy gas grill is worth. ripping your dick flesh off on the sides of charred burger and chicken skin.
now, you could use the gas grill, just rip all the guts out of it. you can even use the kooky grate structure.
using a proper grill or your now modified gas grill, pile charcoal on one side of grill and ignite. wait a bit for that gallon of starter fluid you dumped on it to burn off then put the pre-sliced slabs of ribs that you dry rubbed last night.....oh fuck, you asshole you forgot to dry rub them last night, you idiot. dont waste time making a rub, buy one from the store, dont get that asshole emerils though.
anyway, you can still jam, put the slabs on the other side of the grill from the charcoal. you might want to put a disposable aluminum tray underneath to catch all the fat. then, monitor the coals for at least 5 hours, replenshing every half-hour to 45 minutes. during this time you can pop some wood smoking stuff on, you only need to do this a few times, but the more the better.
if this is followed, then the meat will fall off the bone. if you need to rush it, after four hours, wrap the ribs in foil and replace on grill for ten minutes, the meat will steam off bone.
you can also pop chicken on during the later stages of this process, as well as potatoes, yams, corn on the cob.
go cook your own food.
those people in the world deemed attractive by their respective cultures tend to be more stupid on the average cuz they get by on their looks. you have never been accused of this. i know because you are reading my blog.
when some moistened bint marries that freakish rich dude, it skews things up. all of a sudden, current physical-attractive qualities in one spouse mesh with usually ugly-attractrive qualities and you have mutant children who usually end up really fucked up because of a hot/stupid parent and a smart/ugly/rich parent.
in any event, preparing food is wicked easy. to smoke ribs:
fuck your easy gas grill. thats right, open it up and stick your cock(there are no women reading this, and if there are, they probably have a cock) between the kooky grate structure and pump away. for good food, that is all your easy gas grill is worth. ripping your dick flesh off on the sides of charred burger and chicken skin.
now, you could use the gas grill, just rip all the guts out of it. you can even use the kooky grate structure.
using a proper grill or your now modified gas grill, pile charcoal on one side of grill and ignite. wait a bit for that gallon of starter fluid you dumped on it to burn off then put the pre-sliced slabs of ribs that you dry rubbed last night.....oh fuck, you asshole you forgot to dry rub them last night, you idiot. dont waste time making a rub, buy one from the store, dont get that asshole emerils though.
anyway, you can still jam, put the slabs on the other side of the grill from the charcoal. you might want to put a disposable aluminum tray underneath to catch all the fat. then, monitor the coals for at least 5 hours, replenshing every half-hour to 45 minutes. during this time you can pop some wood smoking stuff on, you only need to do this a few times, but the more the better.
if this is followed, then the meat will fall off the bone. if you need to rush it, after four hours, wrap the ribs in foil and replace on grill for ten minutes, the meat will steam off bone.
you can also pop chicken on during the later stages of this process, as well as potatoes, yams, corn on the cob.
go cook your own food.
